Songs by Tom Lehrer
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Public-domain lyrics

The Wild West Is Where I Want to Be

Tom Lehrer

The open range becomes a landscape of atomic-age anxieties.

Songs by Tom Lehrer Track 4 1966
Public domainSatireCold WarLandscapeWryUneasy
Complete public-domain lyrics

Cowboy imagery collides with radioactive air, security clearances, and desert weapons tests. A split-word rhyme turns the pastoral scene into a nuclear joke. The four printed stanzas and the deliberate mush-/Room line break are preserved.

Verse 1

Along the trail you'll find me lopin',

Where the spaces are wide open,

In the land of the old A.E.C.

Where the scenery's attractive,

And the air is radioactive,

Oh, the Wild West is where I wanna be.

Verse 2

'Mid the sagebrush and the cactus

I'll watch the fellas practice

Droppin' bombs through the clean desert breeze.

I'll have on my sombrero,

And of course I'll wear a pair o'

Levis over my lead B.V.D.'s.

Verse 3

I will leave the city's rush,

Leave the fancy and the plush,

Leave the snow and leave the slush

And the crowds.

I will seek the desert's hush,

Where the scenery is lush,

How I long to see the mush-

Room clouds.

Verse 4

'Mid the yuccas and the thistles

I'll watch the guided missiles,

While the old F.B.I. watches me.

Yes, I'll soon make my appearance

(Soon as I can get my clearance),

'Cause the Wild West is where I wanna be.

Credits

Written by Tom Lehrer

Words by Tom Lehrer, released into the public domain by the author. This is the author-published text edition, not a transcription of a particular performance.

Source & text edition

Author-published lyric sheet · original English words

Tom Lehrer's November 26, 2022 declaration relinquishes copyright in lyrics he wrote. It does not grant rights to third-party music, photographs or album artwork. This edition uses only his words.

Read the author’s lyric sheet (PDF)

View copyright evidence · Author’s public-domain declaration

Retrieved 2026-09-08. Line spacing and section labels are adapted for reading. The displayed text follows the linked edition. Editorial notes and abstract artwork are by 52lyrics.

Source edition: Songs by Tom Lehrer · 1966 · US

Release data: MusicBrainz · CC0-1.0 · Retrieved 2026-09-07.

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