Invitations, matching dishes and formal declarations give way to the possibility of an unplanned decision. The source identifies Lehrer's words and music as an interpolation for the 1973 UCSC student production of Park. It separately credits the original musical to Paul Cherry and Lance Mulcahy; those credits are context, not authorship of this lyric. All thirty-five main lines, including the brief spoken invitation, are retained.
No rice, no flowers,
Friends I can’t abide’ll
Give me no bridal
Showers.
No invitations
To our relations,
I wanna catch ‘em nappin’ --
Oh no --- It’s gotta just happen.
No fake good wishes,
No in-laws dispatching
Hundreds of matching
Dishes.
No ‘lectric toasters,
No silver coasters,
In elegant fancy wrappin’ --
Oh no --- It’s gotta just happen.
And when the time is right –
(If ever)
We’ll turn to each other some night --
(Maybe never)
No scenes dramatic,
No operatic
Duets,
Just “Hey,
Whaddaya say?
[spoken] Let’s!”
So as I’ve often stated,
If I’m gonna wed, it
Won’t be premedit - ated.
I’m not sure it’s going to happen,
I’m not so sure I want it to happen,
But if it happens,
It’s gotta just happen,
It’s gotta just happen,
That’s how it’s gotta happen to me.